Skips Beats Races

(1) I do not do anything the easy way. Case in point: A full, open day of time I could have spent outlining for my exam on Tuesday and getting totally prepared for it—and, what did I accomplish? About 3 hours of work on outlining, 2.5 hours of video games, 3 hours of catching up tv shows on hulu, and two naps at 45 minutes each. Awesome. Now I have to get up tomorrow and have only 1/3 of what I wanted to have finished ready for studying at day’s start.

(2) I am painfully, and perhaps arrogantly, aware of this shortcoming and also apparently incapable of overcoming it. ALL I have tried to do for the past three weeks is put my nose down into a book and work, work, work and plow through material so that I could have the knowledge present in my brain. Every time I have tried, I have failed to achieve more than an hour, maybe two, of concerted focus. The material is not interesting, the information is banal and rote. But, it is information I need to know in order to succeed.

I need to take that step, that shifts my awareness into proactive conduct, and make my life easier by simply doing what I need to do. I need to stop thinking, visualizing, and knowing, and just do it.