Skips Beats Races

Well, since I was about 12 years old at least.

The thing is that every time I go on one of these long-term adventures I experience a re-cap of everything that has come before. All of my big life choices flash in front of me and some play through my head in slow drawn out scenes like a movie projected in 3D for my viewing only. It’s a great point in time for self-reflection, especially as I find myself changing only more rapidly as I get older. I would like to think “adapting”. I have, for the most part, stayed true to the core principles that I believe in. I seek to maintain integrity, be honest, and support my friends with my whole being. I fight for what I see is right, and I strive to let others live their lives as they see fit and support their choices. But, every time I go through my reminiscence again, I see somewhere I have missed the mark, something I did that was less than my best, and people I have disappointed in the past.

I fear that my life will become a collection of people that I have known, and left, and disappointed. I fear that my life will become a collection of places I have been, and lived, and run away from. I fear that in my constant adventuring, I will never find satisfaction. For now I keep on moving, and in a month I will be in London, England. Four months.

Another adventure, I am certain I will like.